Thanksgiving is one of the American creations, but even Canada has an official Thanksgiving Day now, proclaimed by the Canadian Parliament back in 1957. Oops, just missed it. Turns out it was the second Monday in October. As if the Canadians need another excuse for a “holiday,” as my friends north of the border like to call it, eh?

Thanksgiving gives us an opportunity to be thankful for the blessings of our lives. Be thankful that you do not already have everything you want out of life. If you did, what would you dream about? Be thankful there are things you do not know for it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times. During those times you grow… and when you are green, you grow; when you are ripe, you rot. Be thankful for your limitations in life, because they give you opportunities for advancement and progress. Be thankful for each new challenge, because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes. Tom Peters, CPAE Speaker Hall of Fame, once said that we should be grateful for making mistakes. If it is given that in order to have success, we must first have some failure, then it is also a given that in order to have more success, we need more failure. We need to teach people how to fail faster. Failure will teach you valuable lessons. It is the process by which we succeed.

Be thankful when you're tired and weary, because it means you've made a difference. It's easy to be thankful for the good things. A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks. Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive. Find a way to be thankful for your troubles, and they can become your blessings.

Teenagers who complain about doing dishes should be thankful they are not homeless and on the streets. Be thankful for the mess you have to clean up after a bountiful meal; it means you were surrounded by friends and relatives.

Be thankful for the taxes you pay for it means you were employed. Be thankful for the clothes that fit a little too snug because it means you have enough to eat.

Be thankful we can complain about our government because it means we have freedom of speech. Be thankful for the parking space at the far end of the lot because you can still walk the distance. Be thankful for the huge heating bill because it means you were kept warm. Be thankful for the guy who sings off key behind you in church, because it means you still have terrific hearing.

Be thankful for the pile of laundry and ironing because you have clothes to wear. Be thankful for being weary at the end of a hard day of work because you were productive and fruitful.

Be thankful for burning the turkey, it means salmonella will not be a concern. Everyone will think it is Cajun blackened. It might keep those uninvited guests from crashing the party next year. Just imagine, they may like your lousy broccoli lima bean casserole it the turkey is screwed up enough. Even the pets will pass on the scraps and nobody is going to overeat. You needed to test that old smoke alarm anyway. The good news is you can get to dessert quicker. The best news of all is you won’t be stuck eating turkey sandwiches for the next three weeks.

Here are some steps to our readers on preparing this year’s turkey:

Step 1: Go buy a turkey and be sure to thaw it this year (unlike last year).
Step 2: Take a drink of whiskey (scotch).
Step 3: Put turkey in the oven.
Step 4: Take another two drinks of whiskey.
Step 5: Set the degree at 375 ovens.
Step 6: Take three more whiskeys of drink.
Step 7: Turn oven the on.
Step 8: Take four whisks of drinky.
Step 9: Turk the bastey.
Step 10: Whiskey another bottle of get.
Step 11: Stick a turkey in the thermometer.
Step 12: Glass yourself a pour of whiskey.
Step 13: Bake the whiskey for 4 hours.
Step 14: Take the oven out of the turkey.
Step 15: Take the oven out of the turkey.
Step 16: Floor the turkey up off of the pick.
Step 17: Turk the carvey.
Step 18: Get yourself another scottle of botch.
Step 19: Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey.
Step 20: Bless the saying, pass and eat out .

Now you should be drunk enough to endure games this year that will include the Detroit Lions and the Oakland Raiders. The only saving grace is they aren’t playing one another, but on the other hand, if they were, you could get in a great nap. Happy Thanksgiving!